Shine used to say “No one’s soul ever dies; each memory is a small flame, burning amidst so many others. They eventually create a swirling, shimmering glow, illuminated by love, flying up, up, up, until they light the sky with a brilliant glow.”
The Conversation – Losing Touch With Reality?
A while back I was digging in the cabinets in the kitchen when my daughter walked in,
“What are you looking for, Mom?”
“My big cast iron skillet, thought I’d make a pineapple, pecan upside down rum cake for the reunion next month and wanted to make sure it was seasoned and ready. It’s your Dad’s favorite.”
She stood there a minute or two and just looked at me like she didn’t know me then she said:
“Was Mom, WAS. Dad’s been gone 20 years. Go ahead and make one if you want to though – some of the older people there will probably enjoy it, but you’ll have to use a regular cake pan; you gave all your cast iron stuff away years ago. Let me know if you need any help.”
Later that evening I overheard her talking to her husband:
“I think I should call Dr. Brigham and make her an appointment to have some tests run, I’m afraid she’s losing touch with reality and I’ve heard her in her room carrying on conversations with her ghosts.”
“Leave her be. A lot of older people talk to loved one’s who have passed – that doesn’t make her senile or something,” I heard him say as I walked into my room and locked the door behind me.
I May Be Crazy – BUT!
I guess I do spend a great deal of time talking with old friends; laughing and crying over past events. Often things that happened 30 or even 50 years ago seem clearer in my mind’s eye then yesterday’s nightly news.
Don’t misunderstand me I know some; in fact, a great many, of these friends succumbed to AIDS or other illnesses, overdoses, homicides or suicides and ‘accidents’ clear back in the late 60’s or early 70’s or didn’t make it back from Vietnam but I still feel closer to them sometimes then I do to the majority of people I’ve met in the last few years.
“So what if I talk to myself. That doesn’t mean I’m Senile or suffering from the onset of Alzheimer’s does it?” I asked myself out loud.
“Not necessarily,” answered the voice inside me that I remember all too well,
“but you need to go ahead and have those tests run if for no other reason than to alleviate Baby Girl’s worrying.”
I called my doctor and explained to him what was going on; we set up a consultation and on his suggestion I asked my daughter if she wanted to come with me for the first visit. When we left his office that day she had her arms loaded with pamphlets, nutritional guides and anything else he had along with a schedule of appointments for tests he had set up.
The tests were run, no signs of any dementia were detected, and my daughter has for the most part quit looking at me like I’ve grown a second head or something; especially after Dr. Craft and experts on the subject said basically the same thing her husband had told her.
So my advice to anyone who is concerned about the possibility of themselves or a loved one becoming ill is to do the research, talk to the experts, get the tests, and don’t get bent out of shape just because an older relative starts speaking to the dead. It may not be totally normal but it’s not that unusual. Take them to a Senior Center or some other group where people her age and similar likes associate, she needs friends she has something in common with -not your friends.
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